Yesterday, I went for a walk in the woods here in MD. The fall colors are so bright and stunning, what a joy to get out of the house to experience them. I have been feeling paralyzed by fear (about money, about how to best promote this book, how to convey to people that Spirit really wrote it, not me, etc.). In the woods, I wandered off the trail to a large beech tree and offered some tobacco to Mother, Earth Mother, there at the base of the tree. Then I leaned into the tree to ask for its support. The tree told me about courage and being gentle with myself.
Then I walked further down the trail feeling somewhat lighter but still carrying the heavy energy of fear more than I cared for. And when I got to a huge corn field that I have walked around many times, I walked over to the highest place in the field and stood on the rocks that jut out there. With more tobacco, I called on the Creator and Earth Mother, the Ancestors and the beautiful energies of the Four Directions to take this fear from me. This fear that was blocking my heart and my creativity and my capacity to fully promote this book as much as I could. And the fear lessened more. I could feel the shifting and opening and it was healing.
Then as I came back through the woods, a gentle breeze picked up and a voice came through me that reminded me that all of this around me was Mother’s work, Mother’s love for us, all of us. The standing people (trees), two-leggeds, four-leggeds, all of this evolution is Love manifest … and that I could stand there in the midst of that forest and finally release all of the rest of that fear to Mother and her Love. I was surrounded by it and had forgotten that Truth. The revelation washed completely over me and through me and I was washed clean of the fear for the rest of the walk. The joy that filled me instead just carried me down the trail. I was Walking in Beauty.
Later in the evening, a new friend whom I’ve gotten to know here in this hilly, wooded neighborhood came over and gave me a pedicure to help me with this birthing process. This great leap of putting this book out. It was her idea to offer it and I was bowled over by her kindness and generosity.
And I was reminded again of all the Love out there that is always there. Always. Mother and Spirit work in magical ways to express that Love. It is always there for us to discover when we let go of the Fear that blinds us and paralyzes us.
Thank you, Mother. Thank you, Spirit. Thank you to Jenn for the glorious pedicure and beautiful gift whom you are in the world.