[Wrote this on Monday am, finally posting it up here…]
It’s 6:15am, Monday morning, June 29th. Once again I’ve been nudged out of bed very early (for me). I’m sitting in a friend’s beautiful backyard in a historic neighborhood in Denver. The small fountain in the garden pond trickles behind me as crows harass the with the great horned owl in the tree half a block away.
I really want to go over and just commune with the great horned owl but need to sit and write.
Yesterday was the last day of the International New Age Trade Show in Denver and I had the most magical and amazing time. It’s all becoming very clear why Mother told me to just go, foot the bill from my dwindling savings, and go. The organizers are telling me that my books are the buzz of the whole show, especially The Great Mother Bible. Rather wild and humbling. I’m deeply knowing, finally, that this writing habit and work with Mother that I do will carry me in all the ways I need to be carried… Nice to be at this turning point after all these years of doubt, and anxiety with this ‘profession of mine’ and (former) lukewarm sales.
At this event I met store owners from all over the USA and Canada, and there was overwhelmingly positive response to my book and spiritual work. It was so beautiful. I’ve been on a high for the past three days.
Some deep spiritual shifting took place this weekend for me. I knew in being here that I needed to be ‘full-on’ with this commitment to be a voice for Earth Mother in a way that I never had been. I’ve listened, done the writing, struggled through the months of book production, got to the point of exhaustion where I need to go on retreat, and fought my resistance to showing up and really going public. The book is sub-titled “or, I’d rather be gardening….” for a reason.
But the wonderful thing is that I don’t wish I’d rather be gardening anymore. I know this is what I’m supposed to be doing and when I really ‘own’ that, and step into it, then it’s fun and deeply peaceful and the energy I feel is so beautiful.
Very early on Friday morning, I was woken up by Mother and encouraged to do a spiritual journey, calling on all my guides and more spiritual guardians whom I don’t usually call on. But this was a big event and I needed them for support.
They encouraged me to lay down, in my spirit body, on a massage table (in the spirit realms) and worked on me energetically. After they worked up and down my body clearing out any soreness or stuck areas, they then asked me to visualize having an energetic casing around my spirit body with a zipper that went all the way down the front and back, starting at my crown chakra. I could sense that this was an ‘older’ spiritual skin of mine that was made known to me, and invited to shed as a snake sheds her skin. I was invited to unzip this casing starting at my head and just pull the old skin off completely and give it to them to transmute. I believe Earth Mother took it to compost, as she is so gifted at doing with everything (even if it takes her a long, long time).
I knew this skin represented my anxious, scared self that had taken over me for the past few years of writing, working with Mother so intensively as I mostly lived off my savings (that has continued to dwindle). The money piece was the biggest source of anxiety. This was the aspect of me that was so filled with self-doubt, and fear about being called to do this work with Mother and being public about it. I created so many layers of insecurities and resistance that it made me truly sick.
Having this spiritual experience though on Friday morning was significant. It’s as if I have shed this old part of me to step into being a beautiful priestess even more tapped into Mother and her great, great, divine love. Allowing her love to permeate each and every corner of my being, my cells and most importantly, my womb space, where my fears have sat the longest. I can actually visualize a doorway from my darkness into a sunny sacred knoll where a huge, glorious temple to the Great Mother/Goddess sits, awaiting my entry.
This was the energy that I carried with me all weekend and it was deep fun and very energizing.
Shortly afterwards, as I was setting up my table at the Trade Show venue that same morning, one of the organizers of the event came over to my table to specifically tell me that she had been learning about my work already and was quite impressed about it. She was certain that by the end of the weekend, everyone in the whole event would know of my books. She even encouraged me to make sure I spoke with one woman who buys for Books-A-Million, because she was confident that woman would want to seek out my books for their 250 stores.
I was blown away.
Then the next day I spoke with one of the board members for the Coalition of Visionary Resources (COVR) that is partnered with INATS and it turns out he coordinates their awards program. He told me he had already been hearing of my work and said point blank “Please, please submit your book to our COVR awards for next year.”
That also blew me away.
I have to share some coinkidinkies too:
– Spirit Airlines carried me here…
– A huge rainbow appeared beyond the Trade Show venue just after I set up part of my booth on Thurs pm.
– On Sat evening there was a most auspicious owl sighting on the church next to my friend’s house in Denver. The owl has been hanging out for several months in the neighborhood, but you had to find her through the foliage in the tall trees most of the time. Last night she sat fully visible on one corner of the church roof, then hopped to a higher corner, then to a chimney top, and from there to the top rounded steeple. For a full 15 mins, she was just hanging out, regurgitated an owl pellet, preened, avoided the close dives of an obnoxious crow, and let herself be completely seen. My friend was astonished at how the owl just hung out so openly for so long. Finally as the sun was almost down, the owl quietly took off from the steeple for happy night hunting.
Was humbled and honored to have this experience… Thank you, Owl. And thank you, Mother…
Oh, a friendly raccoon and I had a face-off that same evening too… in my walk through the neighborhood after the 2nd day at the Trade Show. Cute, not so small ‘guy/gal’… Love raccoon medicine.
This has been a deeply transformative weekend being here.